On Off, On Off & Pokemon Blinder….

Well it’s been on off, on off, on off all day – in fact it has been on off more times than a whores draws. Yeap, you guessed it I am talking about the house purchase that has been over the course of the day on, off, hanging in the balance, smashed to smithereens and resurrected.

Yeap today there have been more left-sided assaults than at a Liverpool v Crystal Palace football match and more heroic saves on the part of the estate agent, solicitor and beleaguered mortgage advisor as we were putting on our walking boots and preparing to march away with vigour and more than a little stroppiness.


Anyway, at the close of play in the UK today the overnight score ready for resumption of play tomorrow is mortgage offer made, all paperwork signed and scanned back to the solicitor, paperwork in my bag ready for a mad dash over from Heathrow to Swindon to present the original documents in person to the solicitor and vendors removing goods over the weekend.


Now let’s not get too excited about this, over the course of today we have had three different completion dates and quite frankly who knows what tomorrow may bring. However, all being well and BA permitting, (let’s not take anything for granted here, after all it is BA), I will be in good old Blighty and able to deal with things a lot more easily. That may or may not be a good thing, yes I will be a lot more contactable in theory, but I will also be a lot closer for purposes of tantrums.

So here I sit with the gruesome twosome waiting patiently for the BA big bird i watch the world pass by and take up one of my favourite pastimes in such situations – people watching.

I regret to say to say that so far there is little to report. The BA big bird has landed and loads of adventurous people of numerous different nationalities have trooped past us with varying levels of enthusiasm and equal measures of weariness.


The flight crew have yet to appear, that is always an interesting one as somehow we never seem to get too many of the flight crews of the type that brought our heroic GB Team back from Rio and we certainly rarely get a state of the art plane of that type either.

its amazing what the presence of a few camera crews can do.

No, the crews and planes that do the Riyadh – London and vice versa trips are not the types who overflow with an abundance of enthusiasm and yes that applies to the planes as well.

Yes, occasionally there are exceptions….., however as tonight’s inbound crew have just trooped past us I suspect that tonight is not one of those times. Our crew will troop back past us soon, let’s see what our flight has to offer.


Anyway, you will be relieved to hear that amid all the stress, chaos and general unpredictability of today the small man I made it to the gym. No swimming though – that would have been a step too far today.

Now the small man got me hook, line, sinker and copy of angling times today. Yeap, he got me a corker.

The gruesome twosome have been wittering on for weeks about the phenomena that is ‘Pokemon Go’ and have     been mithering for the app.


Being the mean, rotten, miserable and neglectful mother that I am I gave resolutely refused. After all, in their eyes, I love saying ‘no’ and depriving them of their basic human rights.

Then there was today and a small trickster type man.

The small man has discovered an old phone lurking deep in a drawer, has charged it up and has claimed it for his own. For my part I have let him use it but it most certainly is not his.

This morning he was trying to load some apps that we already have from our family iTunes account and as I was busy trying to get ready for the BA big bird I absentmindedly tapped in my iTunes password. He did seem inappropriately chuffed about this, only to have his balloon burst when it became clear I had misspelt the password and a box appeared to tell me do with the app underneath.

Yeap, you have guessed it, he had tried and failed to get me to authorise ‘Pokemn Go’

Ten out of ten for ingenuity, zero out of ten for execution.


Anyway, that was that – or so I assumed.

Now the small man is not daft and at the height of the house buying melee this afternoon when emails were leaping forth from everybody all at once and stress levels were high, the small man repeated the trick and by golly by gosh I fell for it – my mind was elsewhere, somewhere in a conversation with the solicitor I seem to recall.

I knew nothing of this until amid the house buying emails one appeared telling me that in order for my child to create a Pokemon account, I had to create one first.


Now it was one of those situations when you don’t actually know how to react. Himself was with me as the truth presented itself and we were torn between mild annoyance and general respect for the nerve and ingenuity.


Anyway, the upshot is that the gruesome twosome now have the damned app and are currently patrolling the Terminal 1 departures area looking for the little critters.

Right, our flight crew must be inbound and full of vigour and enthusiasm. So I had better get a move on and finish this post.

But what I hear you cry of the beleaguered mortgage advisor? Well, I suspect she is considering a career change, one that will mean living on a remote island with a few cows for company, no phones, no mortgage companies certainly no expats, she will however have an endless supply of  quality alcohol. I am sure I will speak to her tomorrow and I will investigate her current state of mind….


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